A Geeks’ Christmas Carol
On the first day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
A tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the second day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the third day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Three DB trends
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the fourth day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Four IT nerds,
Three DB trends,
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the fifth day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Five truncated strings,
Four IT nerds,
Three DB trends
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the sixth day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Six hairs a-greying,
Five truncated strings,
Four IT nerds,
Three DB trends
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the seventh day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Seven bosses nagging,
Six hairs a-greying,
Five truncated strings,
Four IT nerds,
Three DB trends
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the eighth day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Eight logs for pruning,
Seven bosses nagging,
Six hairs a-greying,
Five truncated strings,
Four IT nerds,
Three DB trends
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the ninth day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Nine buffers flushing,
Eight logs for pruning,
Seven bosses nagging,
Six hairs a-greying,
Five truncated strings,
Four IT nerds,
Three DB trends
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the tenth day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Ten thresholds tripping,
Nine buffers flushing,
Eight logs for pruning,
Seven bosses nagging,
Six hairs a-greying,
Five truncated strings,
Four IT nerds,
Three DB trends
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the eleventh day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Eleven Devs a-griping,
Ten thresholds tripping,
Nine buffers flushing,
Eight logs for pruning,
Seven bosses nagging,
Six hairs a-greying,
Five truncated strings,
Four IT nerds,
Three DB trends
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
~
On the twelfth day of Christmas
My DBA gave to me
Twelve tables truncating,
Eleven Devs a-griping,
Ten thresholds tripping,
Nine buffers flushing,
Eight logs for pruning,
Seven bosses nagging,
Six hairs a-greying,
Five truncated strings,
Four IT nerds,
Three DB trends
Two reorg jobs,
And a tuning tweak for my b-tree
MERRY CHRISTMAS!
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